Siam 22/23

Gold Coast Airport



After being a couch potato for nearly 3 years only daring to venture to my letterbox for a days outing, i was not only forbidden to leave the state of Queensland, but Australia as a penal colony, in fear of being sent to a siberian prison never to see the light of day again. I was rewarded by being allowed to fly internationally without being a test subject in the experimental drug trials, or having to flex a green tick on my phone. My Go To airline to fly to Asia is usually Scoot with their $800 return tickets, but being the christmas period and price gouging by the airlines made my butthole pulpitate, but alas i dug deep and paid $1400 for the same service, just to get the international airport vibe once again. I left the Gold Coast on the usual Singapore junket at 0820 with the 2 hour stopover at Changi Singapore and then onto Bangkok Suvanabhumi International arriving at 1900.

Suvarnabhumi Airport

Once i cleared customs and immigration at Suvarnabhumi Airport, i made a beeline down to the first floor Gate 7 to catch the S1 Red Bus and paid the measly 40tbt $1.50 as apposed to $30 in a taxi, and journeyed an hour to Khao San Road. As soon as i got off the bus industrial deafness set in by the plethora of bars 10 metres apart all blasting differnt music to try and outdo each other and street vendors trying to sell you roast scorpions, city tours, suits, and any other crap you can think of. Then on top of all this mahem and kaos you have to somehow wheel your luggage along shoulder to shoulder party goers, whilst protecting your wallet and trying to somehow find your hotel. I did however notice that the Ping Pong Show pimps have totally vanished from the area, its probably old hat by now with the girls reaching 60 years of age lol.

Ganja and Roast Crocodile

So i did the usual touristy stuff, temples, river power boat cruising , floating market and tiger cuddling, this shit is super expensive nowadays, floating market and tiger show $200 per person and its a 2 hours drive each way from Bangkok. One thing i will mention, tour operators pounce on tourists on Khao Sanh Rd for all kinds of tours, and they spruik 1200 baht to go 90 minutes to the floating market/tiger place which i thought was all inclusive. What they didnt tell me was that i’d have to pay an extra 4000tbt for the experience once i got there.

One thing i really enjoyed was the tiger cuddling, it seemed cruel but the trainers gave me the sob story that this cat got hit by a car as a cub and was then raised domestically by them ever since, could be bullshit who knows ?

There is a Bankok canal boat tour which is 1000tbt per person and i highly recommend that, its right near the grand palace in the city and takes about an hour.

After three days in the Khao San district i decided to experience the Railway to Chaing Mai about 730km north west of bangkok, embarking from Don Mueng train station across the road from the old airport. I opted for the aircon second class carriage with reclining seats, because i was only travelling as far as Phitsanolok for two night stayover about 5 hours. I booked the ticket on the 2go website and printed the ticket before i left Australia for about $40. Khao San road however is one non stop party after 6pm daily.


After 45 beers and a dozen panadol i decided to get out of Bangkok and travel by train halfway to Chaing Mai, to an unheard of town called Phitsanulok, for a duration of around 4 hours. The easiest booking platforn is the 12go website download the ticket onto your phone and show a screenshot to the staff.

Here is a video i made about the experience.

After arriving in Phitsanulok i walked 500m directly north to the Topland Hotel for two nights paying $70/night with breakfast was sensational Western buffet style.

The nightlife in Phitsanulok is all in one area so no need to trapse all over town, if you crave live venue options. I chose to go to the Great wall bar and Bistro as it had the biggest floor area of inside and outside seating, the location is here. Across the road are three more live venues that basically share the same musicians lol.

That Chilli dish by the way was as hot as satans arsehole and immediately numbed my tougue, it took 2 litres of beer to cool that down, this place has no aircon.


Across the road as i said there are a few more bars with live music like the one below, however these have airconditioning.

There are a few interesting government buildings and temples to see plus an impressive bridge over the Nan River.

Two days later it was time to catch the same train the remaining 4 hours to Chaing Mai, for another $20 AUD via

Its worth mentioning this #7 train has aircon, free snacks and reclining seats so its worth the extra few dollars for 500% increased comfort.

Once i departed the train station into the car park, i was inundated with transport options into the city 3km away, the cheapest option is one of the songthaews shared with other passangers for about 100tbt or $4.50AUD. Just give them your hotel name and they seem to know it to the exact GPS coordinates lol, its all repitition im sure.

I usually stay in the Mandala House Hotel as its within walking distance to Loi Kroh Rd bars and entertainmant, the Muay Thai boxing venues and the Night markets.

Hotel also has ample street parking, a swimming pool and extra large rooms for about $30 AUD per night.

Chaing Mai has a lot to offer, Temples, Markets, Historic sites, live music, awesome shopping Malls and trendy hairdressers and Cigar Lounges, it is thilands second biggest city behind Bangkok. Thereare two significant telples you MUST visit, Doi Suthep 306 steps to climb in the North East of the city 11km away and Doi Ithanon about 50km away to the west of the city, both can be accessed by rental scooter if you have the appropriate motorcycle license for 300tbt per day $13 AUD.



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